I have put off writing this blog entry for so long that I feel the topic is far more appropriate than what I was originally planning on writing about. I guess I will write that one later. Now that I have carved a pumpkin, listened to some music on YouTube, played on FaceBook, sat in front of the fire for a while, started a load of laundry, meandered around the house for a bit, played a game with my daughter, messed around with the camera, and cleaned out the kitchen sink, I guess I will sit down here and write this.
I can say with all honesty that I was never a big procrastinator in my life BC (Note that AC/BC does not refer to some obscure rock band from the 70’s, but rather historic periods of my life entitled “after children” and “before children”). So, BC - a decade or so ago (not that I am trying to date myself), I did what I said I was going to do at exactly the time I said I was going to do it. Procrastinating was that thing that old, lazy and/or unreliable people did. It would really bug me if someone said they were going to do something and they didn’t get it done (okay, it still bugs me. What can I say?). I couldn’t understand what the big issue was. Why not just do it and get it over with? Now that I am in the period of AC and pretty much tired 110% of the time, I totally get it. God’s sense of humor is not lost on me as He has yet again served me with a dose of “humble pie”. He took the trait that bothers me so much and in His great and glorious sense of wisdom and humor, decided to pour it into me. We learn by what we live, right?
For MOST people, I think the issue of procrastination is not really unreliability, but rather just being tired and juggling too many plates, especially in today’s day and age. We all have so much going on that we pick and choose things that we have to do and everything else gets pushed off (ignored) until later. For some of us (yes, I am raising my hand), later never really comes. I am realizing more and more how often I procrastinate on things now that I have been a single mom for going into my 5th year. Having two kids in elementary school, I find that I am juggling even more than I was before between work, homework and church activities, and I find my level of personal procrastination growing more, and yes I get irritated with myself. Why the irritation? Because by procrastinating, I cause un-needed stress in an already stressed and hectic schedule. I get done only what I NEED to get done in my personal life, and everything else waits until the last minute. Don’t let appearances fool you one bit. If I look like I am all neat and generally prepared, you can be certain that there was panic either the day before or the hour before whatever the event is.
For example, why buy school supplies a month before school starts when I can stress myself out by having to shop the week before school starts? Have you ever been to the store the week before school starts? All those pen and pencil bins are empty! Don't the stores plan for people like me? What about last minute Christmas shopping… a WEEK before Christmas!!! Call me glutton for punishment. (Did I mention how much I hate shopping?) Here’s another perfect example of procrastination run amuck in my personal life. I invited a friend over for dinner a few Friday nights ago. I wanted to cook a nice dinner; something I don’t get to do very often on account of young, picky eaters in the home. Problem – Procrastination on checking for the proper ingredients. I knew what I wanted to make, I just failed to make sure I had all the ingredients until an hour before my friend was scheduled to arrive. Alas, I did not get to cook the item I wanted to make and wound up with something store bought and tasteless. **sigh** Self-inflicted stress and disappointment (and a tummy ache later, too!)!! And let's not even get started on the condition of my house. It was "lived in" before, but sometimes now I wonder if I am not trying to create my own "creature feature". Oh, wait, that wasn't something growing on my bathroom floor, it was actually the cat. **shew** I did, however, just stop writing this blog and reorganize part of a closet. I am not sure if that should be counted as a negative - procrastinating the completion of this blog; or a positive – organizing something that should have been done a year ago (which of course is also procrastination because I should have done it a year ago!!! **sigh**). Is this really how God wants us to live?
God wants us to honor our commitments and to be responsible for the promises we make, not just to those around us and at work, but I believe to ourselves as well. His word states clearly in Matthew 5:33-37, “33"Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not break your oath, but keep the oaths you have made to the Lord.' 34But I tell you, Do not swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God's throne; 35or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. 36And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. 37Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”
This verse in scripture is very clear “Let your yes be yes and your no be no.” We need to strive to live up to the commitments we make to one another and to ourselves in order to comply with God’s word, not only to those around us, but to ourselves as well. By doing so, we leave a more positive impression on our neighbors and we gain a level of self-respect we didn’t have before.
I know that I am not yet where I need to be on this topic, but God hasn’t given up on me. When I am done writing this blog entry, I am going to procrastinate on folding the laundry and get ready for bed. In fact, I already know that the load of laundry will sit in the basket for several days before it gets put away, but I did dust off my desk yesterday, so it’s a fair trade off and is progress in the right direction. Besides, God loves me even when I am putting off doing today what I can always do tomorrow (or next week).
Psalm 36:7: “7How priceless is your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings.”
